March 3, 2021

Go-Go-Go. No-Go.

Call it COVID. Call it winter. Call it mild depression.

Whatever I call it, the end result is still the same: lack of energy, lack of focus, and a deep desire to want to sleep, lie around, and do nothing.

But that is not who I am. I don’t know how to sit still. And so I create these plans. Sometimes intricate. Sometimes simple. I dream big.

I’ll meet benchmarks for a week, maybe two, sometimes three. And then, BAM!

Energy zapped. Focus dissipates. And I am sitting on the couch, staring at the ceiling, wondering why I lack the motivation and determination necessary to keep moving forward.

I wasn’t always like this. I used to be go-go-go … all the time. I was one of those people who could make the people sitting down around me tired just from watching me. I had a plan and the laser focus, endless energy, incessant motivation, and a powerful determination to see that plan through to completion.

And now, I have a warm blanket, my pajamas, and sometimes a good book.

I believe in the importance of taking a break, of resting my mind. I don’t desire to be go-go-go anymore. I have enjoyed the benefits of replenishing my mind and soul and having downtime.

But somewhere along the way, I forgot how to get started and stay going. It’s almost all-or-nothing. Either I go-go-go, or it’s a no-go.

I don’t really know how to see myself out of this fog of nothingness, so for now, I will do what I know how to do best: find the one thing I can do every day that will help to move me forward.

This is me, stating to the universe, that I am removing the expectation that I will move mountains every day. Instead, I will listen to my soul, take the break it seems to need, and also complete one task that supports my dreams and desires. I will do one thing every day, however small, to move me forward.

Here’s to lifting the fog of nothingness and rediscovering my go-ness.

Until next time,

Create peace in your world,